So...i probably shouldnt be putting this up here on the internet but hey what the hell i dont give a fuck my dad didnt seem to have a fucking problem doing the same thing so why should i give a flying fuck? thats right, i dont.

WARNING: this is a rant, and it contains lots of swears. enjoy.

basically my dad is a fucking herpes infested cunt. long story short he travels all the time for "work" and he doesnt seem to mind it that much. hes been traveling for oh...about since before i was born. well anyway, no wonder he doesnt mind these trips. on these trips of his hes been living a fucking double life screwing over my mom by screwing whores who he finds in those different places.

my mom found this out because he left his email open when he actually brought her on a trip with him (wow! thats like one of the ONLY times hes brought her with him!! i wonnnderrrr whyyyy??? the fucking ass) supposedly he put up this profile online about how hes looking for a "discreet relationship" with someone in the atlanta area (where his other main office is) with pictures of him that he had cropped the rest of the family out of. "tallblonde1229" was his username come the fuck on. check it out, google it, you'll find it. HA for all those women out there looking for a rich asshole who likes to screw over his family on a regular basis and lie to everyone he "cares about" check out his page!! it sure as hell is up there!! go ahead everyone! find my dad online!! bet your dad isnt online for something like this. HA he must be some kind of celebrity or something! wow...im so fucking proud. good job dad.

well anyway, i got to thinking if i would tell my friends or not, and i at first didnt want to say anything because hey, what if it ended up working out between my mom and dad in the end? then i realized that its not going to fucking work out, ever. so, cheers to the downfall of the perfect family image everyone. the truth is more important these days, even if it means admitting that the man who lent my mom sperm to make me has turned out to be no better than the parasite living in the piece of shit that just got stepped on somewhere in the world. wow pop, you make me SO proud...really, you really do.


so sorry paps, if you thought me and tay (my sister) wouldnt find out and we'd still think of you as our loving father, think again. oh and yeah, everyone is going to know what a shitbag you are, you fucking dirty manwhore.

moral of the story: these days the truth is more important than the image of a perfect happy family. beware who you try to screw over.

ahh life. such a simple word, yet so complicated. just the idea of it hasnt even been defined since...well, the beginning of it. i wonder if the monkeys and the cavemen ever cared this much about it, or if they were just thinking about their next meal, not why they ate it. i kinda wish i was a monkey.

there are so many things going on, all the time, at the same time, i dont know what to focus on first, or save for last. and at the moment i cant seem to figure anything out, even what my options of what to focus on are. i know there is something i should be thinking of, and figuring out, i just dont know what.

i dont even know what im talking about right now, im just talking for the sake of talking. maybe itll help me figure out what im supposed to be thinking of. its times like these when i normally write poetry, but i dont really think i have the energy to do that right now. but then again, i really want to.

it seems like every problem ive had in the past year, and am worrying about in the future has popped into my head, and all want to be remembered, like some childhood memory, but really not. ahh im being too emo right now.


you can stop reading now (if you even started)

ive got SO many photographs that i want to put up on here, but i just dont have that much time at the moment to do so. but! when i finally get a chance ill post up the photographs i took in the Windsor Great Park, my backyard, our little bonfire, and throughout London at day and night (my favorite). so, yes, soon enough....well...maybe not, youll be getting a TON of new deviations from me! woo!! be excited! (please?)

i love england/life/all my friends/everything right now, its all going great, i think moving to england was the best thing that has ever happened to me!

just thought id put that out there...
^_^

so me and my boyfriend broke up yesterday...
that wasnt too fun
but ill get over it i guess
hah i am so out of it i sat staring at this screen for 5 minutes just to find the "update journal" button....
any tips on how you get over breakups easier?